Hoping ...

My Darling Readers,

Things are like a rollercoaster right now - I can honestly say, the night before the Babies left, I felt like someone in the front row as the cars go up the tracks ... on the jerky ride to the top of the first hill.

 I wait, I wait.

 I regret, my heart jumps - I see the tracks falling down the otherside and suck in my breath. That sweet, painful relief as you scream all of the tension out from the top of your lungs.

No joy in this, but I hate to say I feel a little bit of relief, since I don't have to look at those sweet faces.

The social workers came and took the children on Friday (September 7th). My heart bled out in tears as I kissed each one good bye, especially Baby D. I'm afraid they might never come back to this house again.

But, thing is, there's hope for that.

Before I yank you along on the rollercoaster that's changed our family so much,  I'll stop and let you think. There's a little hope, and it grows in our home day by day - like a potted sprout that leans towards the sunbeams coming through the window.

No promises that it will survive the cloudy winter, but it sure is nice to have a shoot of green in my house again.

Much love from Africa.